i feel trapped.... i feel like im drowning in an abyss, with my legs shackled, unable to paddle up to the surface for air....i feel like im in a maze with no way out.... i feel hopeless.
$4000 in debt and no money in the bank to pay for food/rent/bills. The money I make with my stipend is able to pay part of it, and I usually have to wait for the next paycheck until its enough to pay one bill, so I'm often behind on my payments.
I know I did this to myself and it was only a matter of time until my habits started to punish me... but I've never been more depressed and stressed about something....
I can't do my homework....I havent been excited to go out and be with friends... when I'm with the people I love, I feel distant. I was hanging with my best friends whom I havent seen in 2 months last weekend, and while I was happy to see them, I wasn't myself. I wasn't the Marc they knew 2 months ago.... I don't know if they noticed...I tried faking being happy... but I was bothered by the looming dark cloud trailing behind me.
I want to have faith to know that God will provide... but right now its tough when deadlines are missed and bills are overdue. I've been trying to be wise about my spending habits... but theres no hope when Im so far in this hole....
I neeed a miracle...
God always provides. The world makes you want to think that you never have enough. Who was it that survived in the desert without food and water? God can do all thing so he can certainly bring yo out of this. Keep your head up and your eyes in the direction of your creator and father.
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